It’s Beyond My Control! (Or is it?)

By Boni Lonnsburry

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Dear Boni,

I have a neighbor who washes non-stop with a very loud washing machine. Talking to her does not help. I would love to create a quiet, peaceful surrounding but I don´t know how to let go of that feeling of anger and helplessness when the noise goes on.

Kind regards,


Dear Frustrated,

Wow. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you. And many of us find ourselves in similar situations; where there doesn’t seem to be a way out and we’re left with a feeling of absolute powerlessness.

And when we have to put up with a constant reminder of what we feel powerless about, such as the relentless pounding of a washing machine, it can leave us feeling explosively furious. Oh, yes, I get it.

But, you see, you are not powerless. You are powerful. And here are some steps to take that power back and create the peaceful environment you dream of:

1.    Get ANGRY! Yes, that’s right. You need to express the rage that has been building up inside you—in an appropriate way (this does not include blowing up your neighbor’s washing machine). You see, unless you release the current feelings of powerlessness and rage they will color and dilute your dream and nothing will change.

What is an appropriate way to release anger? Write a scathing letter to your neighbor (don’t mail it…burn it…safely). Imagine a scenario where you blow up her washing machine (note I said imagine). Imagine calling the police and they arrive and arrest your neighbor, never to return. Whatever works for you, but let the anger out.

2.    Change the following belief:

I am powerful in some situations.


I am powerful in all situations.

And any other beliefs that say you cannot create the environment you choose.

3.    Imagine your peaceful environment. OK, I know…this is the toughie.  How can you imagine peace with no peace? I didn’t say it was easy, I said you needed to do it to change the situation. And this is the rub with conscious creation of all types. We need to imagine being where we aren’t.

You see, it’s more exciting in a way, to have a drama to fight. To have someone to blame. To have a situation that you can rail against. But if you really want peace, you’re going to have to be peaceful.

Here are some ideas: Get some earplugs. Play some white noise. Imagine the washer is the heartbeat of God, protecting and loving you. And every single time that machine stops, own that you did it. That you created peace.

Then, let it go…

After that, who knows what will happen. She may move and another tenant with little need to wash his clothes may move in. You may move to someplace you absolutely adore. The landlord may install a noise-proof firewall. The washing machine may break down, and the replacement might be nearly silent. Take advantage of the law of attraction by imagining a blissful environment but leave the “how” up to the universe.

In joyous creation,


P.S. Keep growing—sign up here to receive regular blog posts on conscious creation, messages from your unseen friends and success stories by real people just like you.


Boni Lonnsburry is the author of three books including The Map - To Our Responsive Universe, Where Dreams Really Do Come True and the founder of Creation School, a place to develop conscious creation skills into artistry.

Read the comments, or add yours

  1. Mukhtar Akpopirebo

    I really love this. Now I know the Universe brought me to this page deliberately. I have similar experiences and I’m going to use this method. Thanks.

  2. Frustrated

    Dear Boni,
    I only just checked up your website and saw your reply.
    Thanks so much for answering!
    I will try out your suggestions and let you know how things go.
    Warm regards,

  3. mindoctor

    Wow, I am again amazed to experience such synchronicity! I have had a similar issue with my neighbors in the other half of my duplex slamming doors and bouncing a soccer ball against their walls. I found myself feeling as you described, “Frustrated” … I tried speaking with various family members, the children and the parents, who apologized and continued the slamming and bouncing … So, I have reached inside to find my peace … with some success. I send them continuous love. It is a bit less frustrating … and sometimes I am sucked back into the frustration. It seems to be an ongoing project. I have asked my higher power and the universe, “what do I need to learn here”. I am still waiting for the answer and continue to work on being peace and being love. Thank you for this post … I needed this!


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